High in the sky,
And a long way down.
My feeling of smallness became very evident in my situation.
For me it was a distance that is rather incomprehensible, and was when I felt an adjustment in my thinking, a bit like a rebalance of my emotions if you like.
This happened to me in what has become a more regular experience of our society today. A plane trip.
Recently, I was travelling interstate experiencing the luxury of a very pleasant plane trip enjoying the window view of blue sky and white fluffy clouds, when I experienced what I liken to emotionally floating.
An experience that I can best explain as a lack of connection to anywhere, yet there was also an understanding and acceptance of where I had come from and to where I was now going. What I had experienced over the past days was causing an emotional rollercoaster and combined to cause this sense of what I describe as emotional floating.
Although I felt like I had – as best my human thinking could – some comprehension of the meaning of the events unfolding in my life, and how maybe they could come together for good, I was also becoming very aware of how limited my own thoughts and abilities are.
No matter how hard I tried, there was no way I could work things out to bring the best outcome for everyone. Yes, I would love to experience the blessing of things going my way, but amongst this I was also becoming aware that it is not all about me.
Here, above it all, came my reminder.
The reminder of who my creator is – the one who has a purpose and plan for all that is happening. I do not know what the future holds, but I know the one who holds my future.
The reminder that I cannot even begin to comprehend how all this could work together to become a better plan and purpose. But the one who knows the future also reminds me that His ways are not my ways.
And the very precious reminder that I am blessed, loved and part of a bigger plan than just mine. This leads me to relax more and allow things to unfold in their own time, and in the way they were intended to.
As I viewed my life and current experience from a different perspective, I not only became more aware of how small I was, but began to feel a sent of ease.
The release of not physically being connected allowed the opportunity for reflection and relaxation, leading to the ability to feel as if I was looking from afar into the situation.
It was a much clearer view.
I have often said it to others, “it is easier looking into what is happening”. This explains this feeling well.
Feeling this way also brought a release of control.
No matter what I did, the greater plan was going to come into being and it was not all about me. There are others involved in this journey with me. They too are being challenged, and the best way that I can support them at this time is by displaying trust in the one who has it all worked out.
Ok, I still struggled with how to imagine the possibilities of the challenges currently in my life becoming part of a greater and blessed purpose, but I was feeling less inclined to seek this out.
I was being pulled toward believing that although I could not see this vision, that this does not mean it could not be so.
The emotional floating was over in such a short time, but as the plane descended to bring me home, I was aware that I had gained more from the trip than a cup of coffee.
Deb
xx
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